Today I shared a video in the Let Us Eat Cake group on Facebook that came up in my newsfeed, titled, ‘What if we talked to straight couples the ridiculous way we talk to gay couples’. It reminded me of the numerous times I’ve been approached in pubs and bars in NI by complete strangers and told, ‘I love you guys. You’re so cute together. You make such a lovely couple. I have a gay best friend, you know, and he’s lovely.’ Normally, they go in for a hug, insist I add them on Facebook and keep in touch, and then they ask for a dance. Because, you know, all the gays throw moves like a ‘dancing queen’ and have the DNA trait to perform the ‘nobody puts baby in a corner’ dance ensemble from Dirty Dancing. I feel like saying, ‘Sorry, love, but I believe in personal space. I limit my friends on Facebook enough without having to wake up to posts from a complete stranger who changes their profile picture with her ten cats daily. And I couldn’t dance if you paid me, nor would I have the muscle strength to table lift a small child, never mind a fully grown woman!’ Okay, maybe I’m being a bit harsh and perhaps I’m over-reacting. But surely I’m not the only one who thinks this is odd. I feel awkward approaching a stranger to ask where the toilets are, let alone to begin delving into their sexuality and proclaiming my love for them.
This actually happened to me at a charity do, just after one of our first Let Us Eat Cake meetings. But, to be fair, she was lovely about it. And then it happened again a few weeks later with a group of ladies in a small quiet pub in Enniskillen. I know it’s not a big deal and it is nice that if I hug or kiss with my boyfriend in public then people support us. But it does make me feel like I don’t want the fuss though. Perhaps if I just stamped ‘gay but grumpy’ on my forehead it wouldn’t happen…
– Chris